Sunday, 26 March 2017

If Mother's Day Is Hard For You...

Today is Mother's Day, a day we are supposed to celebrate and be joyful, a day, like many occasions,  if looked forward to for weeks, months or perhaps years, a day that realistically, might not live up to how your expectations.  Today I have seen many, many messages on social media from people thanking their mums, showing their presents or pictures capturing their day.  But then there are the people who are wishing Mother's Day away, maybe it hasn't gone to plan, your expectations and hopes for the day haven't been met, or maybe you so desperately want to celebrate but for whatever reason aren't able to.  As I sit here I can't help think how sad Mother's Day can be.

This post wasn't planned, nor has it been particularly thought out, reflecting on my day and my life, I felt the urge to write, a very similar urge that made me start blogging in the first place. So whilst it may be deemed a little 'doom and gloom' I felt it important to acknowledge the other side of a day that should be so special, let's face it, Mother's Day for some will have been a complete let down, some possibly even dreaded the day before it even arrived.  You want to be happy and appreciative, you are expected to be happy and appreciative, but maybe this year you don't feel like celebrating, you wish Mother's Day would not happen, maybe there's an overwhelming pain that you just can't shake.

If you look around card shops, there're no cards to recognise...

The child you lost.
The baby you never had.
The child that slipped away before you held him in your arms.
The one that was never born.
The child you feel you're failing.

The mum who you're so close to, but so far from.
The mum you love but couldn't love you back.
The mum you can't love because it the pain is too great.
The mum you lost too soon.
The mum who's slipping away before your eyes.
The mum you could never please.
The mum you wish you could live up to.

Some days you can bury the pain, other days you cannot, no matter what your pain or obstacle is today, I'm writing this post to let you know you're not the only one.  Somewhere over a brunch or afternoon tea, BBQ or roast there is a lady putting on a fake smile, fighting back the tears, feeling exactly the same as you.  Somewhere, there is a lady all alone with no one to phone trying to come to terms with her loss, and letting the tears fall, as you are.

I want you to know that tonight, I light a candle and wherever you are, whoever you are, you're in my thoughts.  Mother's Day is just a day, you have battled through the pain before, you've done the hardest bit and in your darkest moments, know that something, soon enough, will bring you joy and comfort. Tomorrow is a fresh start.



  1. Beautiful sentiment. I have been sulking a bit because my son didn't make me anything (despite me giving him the money to make something at school!) but reminds me that others are having a tough day for very different, sadder reasons.

    1. Thank you, I'm sorry that you're feeling like that today, I've felt sad today too, I'm not sure how I ended up writing this post, I certainly didn't expect to when I woke up this morning. I hope next year is better for you x

  2. This is a lovely sentiment. I felt a bit down today because I felt like I spent the full day driving other people around and hardly got to spend time with my son. It puts it into perspective thinking that some people don't have the opportunity to spend a day with their child or see their mum, though.

  3. I lost my mum in 2014, and find Mother's Day very hard - wishing she was still here to share it with me. That said, we had 30 wonderful years together and for that I am eternally grateful and know just how lucky I am x

  4. I'm so incredibly grateful that Mother's Day isn't hard for me. My thoughts and love are with those who it is though. Lovely sentiment and post xx

  5. Very touching post, I've tread very cautiously today across social, as although it is a special day for many, for others it's a day of sorrow and hurt. It's unfortunate as at some point in my life, I'm sure I'll be in the same position as many. Very thoughtful post and definitely got me thinking.